Thinking things: October 2007

Have you ever felt like you knew you were supposed to be doing something great with your life, but you didn't know when the greatness was going to come upon you? Oh the dreams I have. Oh these fantastic, facinating dreams that I have to do so many awesome things. As I laid in bed last night I was thinking about all of the things that I want to do, want to pursue, want to study, or just want to have as a dream job. Here is my list...

1. Work for a travel magazine and explore the world
2. Go back to school for photography
3. Go back to school for graphic design
4. Write a book
5. Work with the really affluent students and help them understand God's real love for them
6. Live in Czech for a few years
7. Be a mom
8. Learn to sail and take a trip up one of the American coasts
9. Go on a cruise to Alaska

So then the questions I pose...does greatness come upon us? Do we have to live for greatness? Do the dreams we want just come true or do we have to chase them? And I guess the real one I think very often is, will I recognize it when I am living in it?

I think so many times that I am focused on so many other things that I am unable to see what amazing things I have right in front of me and the greatness that God has given me in my life. Granted, right now my job is marginal, and sometimes rather boring. And if I focus on that I am unable to see that when I am not at work I am able to write, to paint, to work with students, to teach students, to do photography, and I may even be able to dabble in some graphic design and photography classes. And my work will also help Aaron and I to buy a Kayak at some point and also will allow us to get rid of debt in case we do want to go to Czech for a little while. So the question is, IS THIS THE GREATNESS I YEARN? And I just can't see it because my perspective is on the wrong thing? I work for an organization that works with countries in East Asia, my husband works for a church that goes to Czech and Ethiopia and the Ukraine. All of which I would be able to travel and not just be at some snooty resort, but I can actually work with people and love on people, which is really what it is about.

And while I would love a job that was maybe a bit different, this one is allowing me the energy to do so many extra things. And it would be nice to have it part time, but once again I am able to get money to do the things I love. It is interesting to me to think about all of these things that I desire to do, and when I get the right perspective, I think I am living in the dreams, living in the greatness, and I just don't allow myself to see it or embrace it. It's a pitty and a shame when I forget how to see the world and see my life because it makes all the difference in living out an ordinary life and a great life!

Here are some GREAT LIFE MOMENTS...